I love my cell phone,
When it vibrates, I start to moan.
I know what you’re thinking all right,
But you gotta let me explain, just sit tight.

I love when people try to get in touch with me,
I’ll talk to them even when I’m on the toilet trying to pee.
A simple text message will do the trick,
If you don’t agree with me you’re probably just a dick.

I fell in love at first sight with this fine phone of mine,
All you naysayers are really out of line.
I am proof that it’s possible to love communicative technology,
I don’t see the point in studying sociology.

Sometimes I wonder if I love my phone more than life itself,
My mom wants me to retire it to an old basement shelf.
I wouldnt be able to function without its cool features,
Even if it means annoying the hell out of my teachers.

I play snake or Jamdat bowling every chance I get,
I browse the internet downloading shit till I’m all up in debt.
Anyways, I think I’ll go to bed now, with my trusty little sidekick,
Although I know just what you’re thinking…and you’re really really sick.